A STITCH IN TIME

Back in the fall of 1968, when I was in 7^th grade at Grove City High School, (7^th-12^thgrades were all lumped together back then), I wore a skirt to school for Homecoming and the reason I remember this is that skirt landed me in the Principal’s office. I must have grown over the summer, because the lovely eggplant velveteen skirt from the winter before, didn’t meet the school code length requirement.

That morning, when our family of 6 had whirled around the house doing chores, making breakfast, cleaning up and dashing to the bus, nobody was really policing the other’s clothing choices. I still remember my outfit: a loden green sweater, tights and the oh-so-fashionable chunk heeled shoes. And I remember thinking that I looked just fine in the mirror that morning. My body tended toward lean and leggy back then (in no way sexy) but, boy oh boy, you’d think my appearance would cause a major distraction with the way I was heralded to the front of the class and herded to the principal’s office. The principal, never a fan of mine or vice versa, smugly measured my skirt with me in a kneeling position and pointed to the Home Ec room where I was given the task of taking down the hem on my skirt and re-hemming it to the desired length. Well, I couldn’t even sew a button on back then. I was almost in tears as I rummaged in the sewing box dear, sweet Mrs. Minke handed to me. She sympathized with me but supported the rules and suggested a seam ripper when I reached for the pinking shears. I think I toyed with the idea of cutting it into a miniskirt. She then found me some matching thread. Are you kidding? She hadn’t had me in Home Ec class yet, so she overestimated my abilities.

The hem came down fast enough with only a few piercings in the delicate fabric. Once I got the needle threaded, I struggled to neatly tuck the bottom of the skirt to the desired length, measuring and taping as best I could. A simple baste was suggested. Okay. Yup. Got it.  NOT! I really didn’t mind missing math or science. But, instead of looking like an even bigger loser, I didn’t want to admit that I couldn’t possibly complete this project before the end of the day. So, I simply stopped mid-stream and taped it the rest of the way before hightailing it out of the room and into the 3^rd hour class.

When I got home and recounted the tale of woe to my Mom, she threw her arms around me assuring me that, yes, we needed to respect the rules and then move on. Her motto was always to pick your battles. There were better hills to die on, bigger fish to fry. And respect authority, no matter how illogical it seems. She just felt badly that she hadn’t paid more attention to me that morning.

I may be a bit scarred by this event, seeing that I still remember every detail. I just wish that Mrs. Minke (and maybe the principal) could see the domestic goddess that I’ve become, the handiwork that I have completed. Some pretty fine stitches. I wish they could know that. And that I never even became a hooker in a short skirt.  

SKIRT STEAK

1 pound skirt steak

Extra virgin olive oil

2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar

Salt and freshly ground pepper

In a shallow baking dish, season steak with salt and pepper. Sprinkle with olive oil and toss with vinegar to coat. Set aside for 30 minutes. Grill over medium high heat 2 to 3 minutes per side for medium rare, 3 to 5 minutes for medium. Slice steak thin on the bias and serve immediately.

SCHOOL RULES HOTDISH

8 ounces egg noodles, cooked and drained

1 pound ground beef

1 onion, chopped

1 cup celery, chopped

Salt and pepper to taste

1 box mushrooms, sliced

1 can cream of mushroom soup

1 can milk

Cheddar cheese, shredded

Cook noodles according to package directions. In a large skillet, brown beef with onion and celery. Add salt and pepper to taste. When meat is browned and onion and celery are tender, add mushrooms and cook until tender. In a small bowl combine soup and milk measured in empty soup can. Combine all ingredients in a greased 1-1/2 or 2 quart baking dish. Sprinkle shredded cheese over top and bake at 350 degrees for 45 minutes.

 HOMECOMING PUMPKIN CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES

1 cup butter

1 cup sugar

1 cup brown sugar

2 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 cup canned pumpkin

3 cups flour

2 teaspoons baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon ginger

1/4 teaspoon nutmeg

1/4 teaspoon cloves

2 cups milk chocolate chips

In a mixing bowl, cream butter and sugars together. Beat in eggs and then add vanilla and pumpkin. Stir in flour, baking soda, salt, cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg and cloves. Mix well. Stir in chocolate chips. Drop spoonfuls of dough onto baking sheets and bake at 350 for 15 to 20 minutes until cookies are browned around the edges. 

GUN TRAINING REVISITED

Back when I was in junior high, I took a firearms safety class. Gun Training, it was called back then. As I recall, I was about the only girl in the room. But I always wanted to do what my brothers did and my older brother had taken the class the year before.

I’m not exactly sure if I thought I would become a hunter. I often observed my Dad using a gun around the farm to keep critters at bay or harvest a pheasant for dinner.  What got me most excited about taking the class was the prospect of being a part of his hunting trips. When I was young, he would head to the north woods for deer in the fall. But what really intrigued me, was the annual trip planning sessions he had with his friend, Gust Johnson. Gust would usually come over to our house for 2 or 3 nights prior to the hunt for antelope or mule deer out west, often to Wyoming or Montana. Spread out over the dining room table, would be maps, addresses and plans for when and where exactly they would go. And then out came the cigars, smoked in contentment as plans were finalized. I was largely ignored but politely addressed as I served snacks Mom put together in the kitchen. Sandwiches and fruit, cocoa and popcorn or cake and coffee were set before the men and I vicariously lived their adventures through my eavesdropping.

It all sounded so exciting, the road trip through the Dakota prairies and on to the majestic mountains of the West. I wasn’t surprised that I wasn’t included. Mom never was and never cared. She welcomed a vacation of her own, to Women’s Retreat at Trout Lake, or a visit to a friend, or just a chance to catch up on projects or hobbies put aside for the busy schedules on a farm.

When Dad encouraged me to sign up for Gun Training, believing everyone should have the ability to use a weapon, I was eager to comply. Did I really think he would take me out West? I’m sure I did. But it just wasn’t in the cards for me to become a hunter. That following winter, Dad’s hunting buddy passed away and he pretty much gave up hunting. Shortly after that, my cousin committed suicide with a shotgun and I simply dismissed guns from my life. Ironically, my father’s life ended the same way twenty years later. I distanced myself from guns even more.

A few years ago, I decided to stop fearing the weapon and embrace the hobby of owning and shooting guns. I am happy to report that, though I may never kill an animal and really have no interest in hunting anymore, I am crazy about shooting at targets and have found it to be as interesting as any hobby I’ve ever had.

I recently came across my copy of Sportman’s Hunting Digest, the manual we students had to study way back in that Gun Training class. Upon completion of the course, I earned a badge (which I also still have) certifying my skill in safely handling a firearm. But the mule deer mount Dad gave me after one of his trips (did he know how much I wanted to share his experiences?) that hung over my bed back then, somehow disappeared over the years.

But my Montana son, Haakon, now living the dream I never experienced, is providing all the meat and mounts we will ever need or want.

ROAD DITCH CHICKEN

4 small pheasants, cleaned and rinsed

1/2 pound bacon

1 can cream of mushroom soup

1 cup sour cream

1 cup water

1 small onion, chopped

1 packet dry onion soup mix

1 cup sliced mushrooms

Salt and pepper to taste

Place prepared pheasants in a slow cooker. Wrap or cover the pheasants with bacon slices. In a medium bowl, whisk together all other ingredients. Pour over pheasants. Cook on low for 8 to 10 hours or on high for 5 to 7 hours. Serve with wild rice.

VENISON STEW

2 tablespoons oil

2 pounds venison

3 onions

2 cloves garlic, minced

1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce

1 bay leaf

1/2 teaspoon dried oregano

Salt and pepper, to taste

3 cups water

7 small potatoes, peeled and quartered

1 pound carrots, peeled and sliced

1/4 cup flour

1/4 cup water

In a skillet, brown meat in oil. Add onions and garlic, Worcestershire sauce, bay leaf, oregano, salt, pepper and water. Simmer, covered, for 1-1/2 to 2 hours, or until meat is tender. Add potatoes and carrots and cook until done. Whisk together flour and water. Stir into stew. Heat thoroughly and serve.

HUNTER’S CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES

2 cups shortening

2 cups sugar

2 cups brown sugar

2 teaspoons vanilla

2 teaspoons baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

5 eggs

5-1/2 cups flour

2 cups chocolate chips

In a large mixing bowl, cream butter and sugars. Beat in eggs, vanilla, baking soda and salt. Beat until well blended. Add flour. Stir well. Stir in chips. Drop by spoonfuls onto cookie sheets. Bake at 375 degrees for 7 to 8 minutes. Cool on wire racks.